Everyone who’s been married knows the dreaded all-too-real, low self-esteem feeling of watching your spouse leave you to start their new life with someone else. You might feel like you’ve been hit in the gut with a sledgehammer, and the initial sting doesn’t seem to be going away any time soon.
The good news is that there are lots of people out there who understand how difficult it can be to make friends after divorce, especially if they’ve lost their social circle as well. The people who are out there waiting for you will bring new meaning and purpose into your life when you accept their friendship.
Let’s take a look at some ideas for making new friends after divorce, especially if you’re the kind of person who struggles in the first place.
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For many, joining a club or group of friends is the way to go to regain control of yours. Whether it’s a sports team, church community, or a book club, these social groups provide people with a sense of belonging and friendship. Additionally, you can use this time to rebuild your social life and make new friendships with like-minded people as well.
Some people might think that they don’t have the time to deal with such obligations in their personal life or that they can’t do it right now. But if you spend some extra time thinking about what you need and want at this point in your life, you might be surprised at how easy it is to find things you enjoy doing and people who will appreciate them.
One of the best things you can do for yourself after a divorce is to start dating again. The first thing that you need to do is stop thinking about your ex as if they’re still in the picture. It’s important to remember that they are not there any more, and they don’t deserve any attachment or care from you any more.
Dating will help you get back into the swing of things and find someone new who makes you feel good about yourself and your social life. As soon as it starts feeling normal again, then it’s time to start dating. Yes, even if it feels like everyone around you is happily married with no one single person left out (how depressing).
If you want to meet someone new but don’t know where to start, give online dating a try. Online dating sites have made it so much easier for people to meet other singles who share their interests and qualities. Even if no romantic relationships come out of it, you may find yourself regaining control of your social life by making friends for life!
It can be hard waiting for the person who’s going to make sense of your life again—or even worse, wondering what might have been if only circumstances had been different—but stay positive and keep moving forward!
Many people automatically assume that the answer to this question is “I want my ex back.” But you might be surprised to find out that what you really want is something different. Maybe it’s just time to get on with life and move on, maybe it’s just time to stop stressing about the past, or maybe you just want some new friends to hang out with.
Whatever you decide, finding out what your true desires are can make all the difference in the world when it comes to figuring out how your life will go after a divorce. If you’re still trying to figure out what you really want, start asking yourself questions like:
What would make me happy right now? What do I need right now? What am I looking for in a partner? Who do I need in my life right now? How does this make me feel?
Have you ever heard a divorcee say that they regret going to the gym and getting into sports? It’s true. For many people, they left their marriage feeling weak after having spent all of their energy on the other person. They lost their motivation and, thus, any reason to live.
But the key is in finding a sport or fitness activity that makes you feel strong and empowered, not just physically but emotionally as well. For these people, getting back into sports can be an ultimate way to reclaim their life’s strength and move on from their broken past.
The first thing you’ve got to remember is that you really need to take care of yourself before you can think about being friends with your ex again. If you’re feeling worn-down, unhealthy, and depressed, then it won’t be long before you’re a hermit (or worse) all over again.
Or, if you already have been a hermit while they were still living together and they left first (not the other way around), then that might explain why they’re not returning your calls anymore.
So, if this is the case, then there are a few important things that you should do in order to get yourself back on track. The first thing is to eat right and sleep well. Everyone needs both of these things in order to feel good and healthy; so make sure that your diet is balanced and don’t neglect getting enough rest.
The first thing to do is jump-start your life by finding something new to be interested in. You might think that you only have time for one new hobby, but there are tons of ways to incorporate a new interest into your daily routine. Maybe it’s getting involved with a local theater group or joining a community sports league.
It’s important not to focus on what your current friends or your ex are doing with their new life, though. If you want to move on from the heartache, you must put yourself out there and get involved in something else—something that will help take your mind off of them.
Maybe you’ve been out of the dating game for a while, and your former spouse is going through a different stage of life. Maybe they have kids and you don’t want to impose on them, or maybe they don’t want to be around people who remind them of what they used to have. It can get lonely after a divorce; not having anyone in your life can feel like the emptiest void imaginable. But these feelings aren’t true.
People who are struggling after a divorce often look for friends and support in the wrong places. They try to find friends through social media, online dating, and even through mutual friends. But those efforts can be fruitless. The best option for a friend is to find someone who has been through the same experience and is in a similar place.
And, of course, never underestimate the power of your existing friends. While it may seem like you’ve lost your social circle of friends, it may just be that circumstances change in the future and they re-enter your life in your new friendship circle!
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