by Alex Andy Phuong
On one Labor Day afternoon, while driving down a Revolutionary Road, a simple, all-American girl named Kate Winslet was searching for something to do for her summer vacation. After driving for several hours, she saw a billboard with the headline, “TITANIC SAILS ONCE MORE!” She hesitantly resisted the urge to buy tickets for a summer cruise because of her fear of drowning. After stopping by Laguna Beach, she went into a library to check out a copy of her favorite novel, Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen. Kate often identified with Marianne Dashwood because of their romantic sensibilities. She also enjoyed Shakespeare, and her favorite fictional character from the Bard was Ophelia from Hamlet. After returning home from the library, she became not just A reader, but The Reader. As she read a book about Steve Jobs, she pondered what life would be like if she were to have Little Children. She also feared Carnage because she wants to live happily ever after rather than suffer a miserable demise (which could have happened if she boarded that Titanic replica). As night began to present itself, she went to bed while letting her mind expand with the Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Curiously, this simple young woman is still nothing like the famous British actress because the Hollywood legend has green eyes while Kate’s Irises were hazel.