My beautiful son Beighbee, who was absolutely perfect until that fateful day when he received his six-month vaccinations and then two months later developed a slight cold after playing with another child who also had a slight cold, has had his life ruined by autism. And, of course, when Beighbee’s life is ruined, so is mine. I was promised an absolutely perfect child, and instead I got a child with no orange juice, because autism drank it all.
I soldier on, despite being unable to warn other parents about the ravages of having no orange juice, because autism also changed the password on my computer. Every day is a struggle, and sometimes I feel exactly like a combat veteran who wonders when the bombs will stop falling. It’s tough, being in the trenches with no orange juice or computer access.
After a while, you start to get used to it – and then autism does something horrible to further ruin a family’s already destroyed home.
Just today, for instance, Beighbee, who mastered climbing onto the counters to get his own box of Lucky Charms despite having no orange juice to drink with them, began shrieking out of nowhere, as if demons were yanking on his junk. I came running into the kitchen, certain he had fallen headfirst off the counter and left his brains all over the floor.
But what was all over my floor…was cereal.
In fetching his box of Lucky Charms, Beighbee had dropped it all over the floor. And there were no marshmallows in it. Just those little grain cereal bits no one ever eats. (I tell Beighbee to pick them out before he puts milk in, but he never does.)
Sometimes people ask me, “Why are you so angry at autism all the time?” This is why. Autism is ruining our lives. My Beighbee can’t go a single day without crying over some horrible thing autism does to make his life harder, like drinking all the orange juice or eating all the marshmallows out of the Lucky Charms. I wanted a perfect child, and instead I get one who cries a lot and has a slight cold.
I don’t like to use swear words, but f*** autism.
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